Halitosis

The last two days I have been on two road trips with at least two bros each two, I mean, time. The first was early Friday morning over to the Marshalls' (and we ended up going to Six flags Magic Mountain too...added bonus). The Marshalls wanted to leave early, but we left their house 6:39; nine minutes late. Thankfully, though there was traffic, we still ended up getting their two hours before the park opened (give or take nine minutes). The lines were amazingly short, so we went on everything epic several times before closing. But the most exciting part of the day was when there was a guy completely stopped in front of us in the carpool lane on the way home. We might not have nearly hit him if his lights were brighter than two Christmas lights in broad daylight. Speaking of Christmas, actually never mind. We left the park at around 6/6:30ish, and we got home around 9ish/9:30ish; give or take nine minutes.

I stayed up a little late, so getting up the next day for the next trip was a little hard at first. I didn't say a whole lot on the drive, because I sorta' left my voice behind on X2. Nevertheless we were on our way to the Turbedskys'! (we ended up picking up M.Turbo, Mr. Knotts, and Mr. Morgan and went to the Gospel Coalition LA conference put on by D. A. Carson). Reality LA church was gracious enough to host people from all over California to listen to five sessions put on by D-Awesome Carson.

We kept eating out at fast food type places, and one of which was an epic trip to Pinks. Pinks is a famous little place in Hollywood where, if you happen to be going to the Turbedskys' and then end up heading to LA is the place to go to. Not to mention a ton of celebrities go over there too (but who cares about that?). The line for getting a dog at Pinks was about as long as the longest line I waited in at Six Flags.

I think the thing that I enjoyed most about the conference was getting to talk seriously with people about the gospel. A lot of the time when people bring up the gospel with me, or I with them, we say something like, "Yeah, that's good. So, how was Six Flags?" Talking seriously with people about the Gospel was probably the highlight of the weekend. I wish I would humble myself to talk about it more, because I am always glad when I do. Although, I'm not sure everyone was as happy to talk with me, because at that point in the day after two long days of early mornings, and fastfood, I had only brushed my teeth once in that whole amount of time. When I got home, I brushed my teeth all night...give or take nine minutes.

The Last Day

Yeah, I finally got writer's cramp, I mean bored, no! I mean finished with all the journal entries I made on the trip. You can tell by reading this one that I was a tad bit tired and/or dazed from the traveling. Just hand me the straight jacket, Hitchcock.

"Aug. 19, Day 20:

Today was the twentieth day of travel, that is the twentieth day of the trip, the nineteenth day of the month, the twentieth day of family vacation, one more day spent in the car the nineteenth day since I’ve seen our house, the twentieth day of travel; the last day.

The drive from Calaveras County California to Orange County, for me at least, was spent in the far back seat of the car, which brought back memories of when that was “my seat” and would ride back there most often. The only exciting thing I saw on the drive was a grass fire burning up the yellow fields of Northern CA. My other family members may have seen interesting things out of the windows, but I was looking at my DS all day.

It seems strange to be back, and the only way I can think now how to describe it is different. It seems as though a part of me is missing as I walk the familiar floors and touch the same old walls, and yet inside I feel as though I have gained much from the time outside the home. But I feel a stranger under the roof, not as a burglar, but though someone has robbed me. Perhaps it is the fact that nothing has really changed inside the house, nearly everything is exactly how it was (except maybe dustier) when I left twenty days ago, and am now back twenty days later, nineteen days since I last saw the house, the last day, but I feel different than I did 3 weeks ago. And perhaps it is some strange phenomenon like the scheme of life…One quick, overall glance and nothing seems to have changed, but a better observer would conclude in a very Sherlock Holmes like manner, that much has indeed happened. Though in a couple of days the trip’s blur will dissipate, and life will seem to go on like the objects in the house; the same they were when we left twenty days ago, twenty days of travel and vacation, nineteen days since I last saw the objects in the house, maybe if I watch more closely I will see that things really aren’t always the same, but are different. Suddenly I shall find myself more filled “at home” all the time. I can now look ahead, to the “bear” speck of the future, and have hope that that is indeed what it is.

Well, I’m back. Thank you for your prayers!"

If you think that this is the end of my crazy blabbering about road trips, then you are road kill-wrong! I will continue to blabber about epic awesome travel times until I am too old to travel! Eat that, possum boy!

Still up near Angel's Camp

Aug. 18, Day 19:

Today we skipped up to Lake Alpine. It took quite a bit of skipping considering it was an hour drive away. Let me just say that it took a few more skips than 10 on the hopscotch paved road to the lake. But, to get off that tangent, we had a marvelous time kayaking around Alpine. It was so peaceful paddling up and down the beautiful lake that it hardly seemed like exercise. Although by the third trip out I could really start to tell that it was in fact work. But it was very relaxing nonetheless. And I even completely drenched Zac who was in the seat behind me on my last time out in the open waters after he gave me a quick splash or two. I felt a little bad when the wind really picked up, but I figured it builds character. And what’s feeling a little bad for someone in the scheme of life anyway? Never seemed to help me much, but put myself into a lower state, similar to the individual I felt bad for in the first place. How does that help me?

After the time at the lake, we had dinner and celebrated Christmas and my dad’s birthday with the relatives. It is neither of those days, but the grandparents were anxious, like a certain Zac was to dry off, so we celebrated anyway. No way I would or could turn down pie and ice cream. Following the funny family festivities came grandpa’s book on making mouth sounds. We all looked and sounded so strange, and we laughed a hearty good long time. While I worked on my elephant and choreography, Zac mastered many other sounds in the book, showing us all up. Now I really don’t feel bad for soaking him. Now, if only he could invoke a sound that would dry him off faster, then I’d be impressed. And then perhaps I’d feel bad for him…nah, no I wouldn’t.

Really Green

Continuing my travel journal...

August 17, 2010, Day 18:

We are in Angel’s Camp, Calaveras County, California, which if you’re like me you probably didn’t know is frog country. This amphibias area was popularized by Mark Twain in his book, “The Celebrated Jumping Frog of Calaveras County,” which he published under his true name, Samuel L. Clemens. This toad town is totally tainted by the creature since they really are the only things here. Even the color scheme of the World Mark we are staying at has a froggy after taste; I mean it. And when I say I mean it, I really mean it.

To try to escape the green frog world, we went to Jamestown. No, the one in CA. Which if you’re like me, you didn’t know there was such a place. And this place was sort of an old train yard, housing trains from every western film that ever had a train in it. There was a room where they showed some of the scenes from a few of the shows and movies that were filmed there. When the scenes finish, they start again. I now know by heart one of the last sequences in “Back to the Future 3,” and “High Noon,” and I meant it. Now when I say, I mean it, I really mean it.

After burning up in the heat looking at trains, we went to see some specifically titled “Big Trees.” The trees, namely, were Sequoias and Red Woods. Suddenly the vague name puzzle began to piece itself together. The Big Trees were amazing. And up where the trees were was at least 10 degrees cooler than Angel’s Camp, so we stayed up yonder awhile before returning to Frog Ville. Later in like manner we frog-hopped to the pool, and only ate a few flies on the way.

Next we had another amazing meal and played some Mad Gab. Being with Gramps and Gran is always a barrel of laughs, especially when Mad Gab is involved; and I mean it. And when I say I mean it when Mad Gab is involved, “Hi rell He Me Net!”

Rhubarb

August 16, Day 17:

I haven’t made the time to write for a couple days, but nothing extremely exciting happened until we waved good-bye to the last relative at our Branson Family reunion.

At the reunion were many plagued creatures, growling creatures, creatures that climbed on rocks, and just your average wild and squirrelly creatures, but enough about the relatives. We had many Texas Hold ‘Em and Uno games, with many a smore and snack item (which is code for toothache and cavity). It was one more day after that family reunion and the next, so we stayed at the campground one more night with our family, the Wrights. We had an epic around the campfire story that I will never forget, but also one that I will never fully understand because each person would say a couple of sentences then pass it on to the next helpless victim. Who knew eggplants were eagles, and eagles were rhubarb? I’m still not quite sure.

Today as we were driving on to the Davis reunion, we stopped at a pull out on the side of the road to make sandwiches and leave some deeds. Had we only known a nice rest area was just around the next bend, I wouldn’t have had to slip down the hill just to sneak a leak.

Now we are here at a World Mark with my Grandpa and Grandma, they were the only two that showed up. What, did the others change their plans about coming because they heard we would be there? Or was it that they knew we were coming with two weeks of camping, sweat, dirt, and little cleaning beforehand? Either case, I scrubbed the ash from last week from out between my toes in the shower just now. Take that.

Extended Family, when I wanted to Extend the Limbs

August 12, Day 13:

Today’s drive from Oregon has been long and dull with the only excitement being vultures circling over the road. “Oh good,” I thought, “When I die from boredom my body will be dealt with cleanly.” Later as the trip continued, and I started to doubt if I was ever actually going to die, “Hey vultures, if I don’t die for awhile, could you at least use your talented talons to tantalize my tired tokus? I’ve been sitting for a long time and my butt is sore.” As you can see I haven’t died yet, but man bird feet are hard on a rumpus.

As we are rounding Lake Tahoe, I am reminiscing on the bathrooms I have been in between the last couple of days. I am still waiting for paper toilet seat covers…

In the last two days, I have stumbled upon various strange urinals. One I was standing at yesterday whizzed on me, while I just stood there. Our positions are switched completely the opposite where I come from, and the funny thing was that after the backward experience, I still had to use the bathroom. One today was pressed up against the regular toilet so that when I sat down my knee was jammed in the small space between the urinal, the toilet, and the wall. After the firemen came and got me out, I was able to zip up my pants, and we finished our drive to California.

Well, we’re here; going to be hanging with the extended fam. I’m now hoping one of them is a massage therapist like you see on infomercials, because it is surprising how much one backside can hurt from sitting down for so long, especially with added vulture talons enlodged inside.

We just got an interesting high view of two lakes on each side of our car. Can’t wait to soak sore, um, certain, um, articles of my anatomy in the cool water. But I’m leaving that behind me, just like it always is.

Aug. 13, Day 14:

Gotta’ love those family reunions! Well, maybe you don’t, but I have to since I’m at one right now.

The family on my mother’s side and ours are staying at Lake Tahoe and let me tell you about Lake Tahoe’s healing principles. First we went down to the lake via Pope Beach and had to pay a whole 7 bucks just to park! Then we froze to death swimming in the lake. After we thawed out a little, we broke our arms off in a family volleyball game. Then after I thought we had hope for recovery, we played and intense game of Texas Hold ‘Em. After that a mama bear and her cub came through the campground and scared us to death. But like I said, gotta’ love those family reunions.

Long time, no pee

Entry 12 of my travel journal. No need for you all to read every single one of these, but I figure when the zombie uprising occurs, the sane people will have something to laugh about while their flesh is being devoured. Enjoy, sane people.

August 11, 2010, Day 12:

Watch out, the Davis family is on the road again, and we are armed and dangerous with Burger King and Costco under our belts. Don’t ask me how we fit the two buildings in our pants; I’m still not quite sure myself.

As it was for most our nights up north, we got rained on. Last night was no exception. It looked a little strange to have our tent set up in the back of the Burger King parking lot to dry while we ate lunch, but even stranger were the looks we got because of our drying method. One man got out of his camper and asked us if that was the only place we found to camp. We came up with a witty remark much later, as most witty remarks come, and said, “Looks pretty good to us, we’re from LA.”

We left our campsite in Jasper around eight this morning and finally got out of Canada at about four. It would have taken half as long had we gone the fast way, and there hadn’t been a line the exact length of Rhode Island to get across the border.

While still in Canada we saw mountain goats running up and a steep hill, fields of purple flowers, and yet more stinkin’ waterfalls.

We entered into Idaho and made our way to Washington State. I have never been in Washington before and Joey made the comment that northern Idaho and eastern Washington look exactly the same as south western Alberta; he was right of course.

On the drive, the temperature has changed as often as the time. Apparently we are driving on the thin line between Mountain Time and Pacific Time. Right as I wish I had the last hour of my life back -poof- it’s there! If I want time to pass by a little quicker –poof- it happens! -Even though we aren’t an hour more down the road.

I am now getting a little tired, it has been about 12 hours in the car so far and there are many more to come, (especially if we cross back into Mountain Time). I think the best way for me to knock out and sleep right now is to get a whiff from my wide selection of footwear; Righty and Lefty. I just can’t hold my shoes to nose level or everyone else will droop off too, including the driver.

With power at my toe-tips, Ben

Aw, can't we st'eh?

August 10, Day 11:

I have taken so many pictures of so many things that I don’t even remember what the things are anymore.With all the pictures I have taken I may as well have had my view finder stapled to my face, documenting everything on the trip. A glue stick might have worked, but I didn’t have one lying around. We saw more waterfalls, similar to the ones we saw yesterday, one of which I call the Water Slide of Death. Not sure what it’s really called, but mine is more accurate and easier to pronounce I’m sure. One waterfall that I took a billion and twelve pictures of had a rainbow in its mist. Ah… many a memory of viral videos on the web.

We didn’t end up going on the glacier tour, but we went on the most awesome hike to a glacier and a lake with large ice chunks floating about inside. On the way to get there we saw many more vast glaciers, and a black bear.There might have been more, but that’s as much as I could tell with a camera stapled to my eye.

To get to the hike, we had to drive up a very windy road, and the irony was that the two people who don’t get motion sick were to two in the front seats; namely, my dad and I.

The hike was gorgeous with an amazing view 300 and 60 degrees around us. The scale of everything seemed to grow the closer we got. Waterfalls that seemed ten feet were actually more like 200 feet. Perhaps I could be more exact if I used meters like Canada and the rest of the world, but I am a rebellious American. Boo Yanks!

We switched seats on the way back and just now got all choked up about dinner; mostly because we ate in a smoky room with an old oven. The smoke turned the ceiling brown while the rest of the place was white washed wood.

We will be leaving Canada early tomorrow, and let me tell ya’, I’m gonna’ miss the place. With its beautiful Rockies, funny accents, and no paper toilet seat covers in their “washrooms” (which around here at least don’t have running water), who’d want to leave? Well, I’ll see ya’ll back in the U-S-eh, that is if I get these staples out of my face.

When are these going to be over?

If your asking that question, don't worry. You are not alone. But, below are entries 8 and 9 to my travel journal anyway.

"August 8, 2010, Day 8, I mean 9:

We continued our stay in the beautiful place of Banff, Canada, driving around the park because of the off and on rain showers. We saw many gorgeous lakes, marvelous mountains, cataracts, a big horn sheep right by our car, and glaciers! It’s funny that in our whole stay in Glacier National Park we really only saw one glacier. Now we are seeing many wondrous glaciers on glorious mountain sides. YAY Canada!

Today while we were on a small hike to look at a place where there was an active coal mine, I was thinking about the people’s lives that lived and worked there. It got me thinking about eternity, and the saints we will meet who lived at that time. God cares about each one individually throughout all times.

The one time I forgot to bring my camera was on another hike which just happens to be one of the best, most beautiful, amazing hikes of the trip. Both upper and lower falls were fantastic, but at lower falls there was a lady who was laying on a rock at the top of the falls. It would have ruined all my pictures had I brought my camera. Perhaps it was more of God’s providence.

I am trying to hold myself back from taking pictures of everything, because the camera is starting to get full, and this is only the 8^th I mean 9^th day of travel; two more weeks of the trip to go.

I think I’ve covered all that has happened, except maybe my dad’s photo taking obsession. Oh yeah, Zac found two four leaf clovers so far on this trip. I don’t think I have ever found one; talk about overkill. Zac says that he has found too many to count in his life, but if he had to put a number on it he would have to say around 50. I’d say closer to 49, but I digress. I think he’ll find more before the remainder of the trip is over…maybe.

August 9, 2010, (8/9/10), Day 10:

As if the trip couldn’t get any worse, Zac found 16 four leaf clovers just today, and 5 five leaf clovers! Five leaf clovers? I didn’t even know they existed. Perhaps the leprechaun wouldn’t have found so many had he helped more with the tent take-down this morning. No, I’m just kidding, he probably helped more than I did, because I was looking for the lucky clovers, with no luck. If Zac just looked down he’d see three more, so I taped the back of his head to his shoulder blades and glued his eyelids shut. I said, because of his luck, that I’d undo it all when we came to the next Canadian Lotto place, which I figured we’d find sooner than I would ever find a four leaf clover.

Well, we went on the wrong freeway for a while, but right before we noticed we saw a ton of people stopped by the road. Pulling over we saw a huge grizzly out in the distance. Three steps better than any old speck, we stayed for a few minutes watching the bear walk on the train tracks. I still don’t quite know the end of the story, but the bear was still trudging along after we turned around and went back the other direction in Yoho, British Columbia. Once we got going the right way we saw a black bear right by the gutter, and later a mom and two or three cubs trailing behind.

Still in Banff, we experienced some of the most picturesque sight of the entire trip with huge glaciers all over the place! Look right, then left, beauty all around.

We are now in Jasper, enjoying the many glaciers and are planning on walking around one on a three hour tour. I am a little wary however because we all know what happened on another three hour tour. Especially with the possibility of the glacier suddenly breaking, separating, or the possibility of falling down and getting lost in a deep dark crevasse with little hope of survival and rescue…It is now getting late, sweet dreams! "

To read day one of this crazy long journal thing, click here.

Eh?

Below is entry 8 for my road trip journal. Click here for day one... 'case you wanted to catch up.

August 7, Day 8:

Yesterday’s sarcastic one didn’t go over so well with the fam, so I’ll stick purely to the facts. Haha, eh hem.

The day picked up quickly, with a citation just after breakfast. We committed the felony in the campsite right around the corner from ours where the former tenants left, nice, fresh wood sitting in their fire pit. My dad looked both ways, and didn’t look back. They probably left the logs for the people who would be staying in that campsite next, but we didn’t care, and quickly exited the crime scene. After we entered Canadawe realized that we weren’t supposed to bring wood across the border. It might have taken us longer to figure it out except for the fact that there was a huge sign that said, “No firewood in case of Dutch Elms Disease.” But the border patrolman didn’t ask, so we didn’t care. We got out just desserts however because we are now staying at a campsite where you cannot have fires. I’m now wondering how we are going to burn off all the Dutch Elms disease we brought over.

As if stealing firewood wasn’t enough, almost immediately after the huge sign, there was a pullout with a restroom. The men’s and the women’s sides were separate, but since each had a pit toilet, where the stuff went down into for both sides was connected. My dad thought that my mom was still in the women’s and when he heard a long trickle of wee coming from the other, he yelled through, “I hear someone a’ pee’n in there!” But, that was not my mom weeing. Hello Canada, here come the Davis Family!

After this we went to the Bison Paddock, which unless I spelled it wrong sounded promising to us. At least all 7 buffalo that were way in the back corner looked majestic.

To change the subject, right as we crossed into Canada we noticed all their road signs are a lot more pictorial. It makes the signs much more enjoyable, so much in fact that drivers might actually look at them. Not that I could understand the signs if they did have words, because half of it would be written in Quebec-ian French. I actually think that is why they use pictures because it is more universal; that way they don’t have to write it in English as well as French.

Since we missed the US so much, we went to a KFC/Taco Bell combo for lunch. How much more American can you get?

Now we are at a campground in Banff (which is surprisingly difficult to say), and with each stop we get faster at setting up the tent, with the exception of making a lean-to out of the tarp in case of rain. We told Joey to hold it down so that when the wind starts blowing he’ll have a nice Para shoot ride into the trees. Eh hem…well, it is nice to be clean, I hadn’t had a shower since the RVish Park. This shower had a button, so you can’t control the temperature, and the water kept shutting itself off every 10 seconds. I’m not complaining or anything (or being sarcastic), I’m just stating the facts. Oh yeah, I am calling the mosquitoes, “Mass-quitoes” because of their great numbers up here. My dad says that since it gets so cold, they only have a few months to attack. That’s why they are so vicious. Who knows…just hand me the hair, I mean bug spray, lady.

Having a wonderful time.

August 6, Day 7ish:

Today, after a long, hot, crowded bus ride, we went for a long, hot, hilly, humid, sweaty, bug infested hike with dead trees and no rest areas. We had a great time, seeing great views like the one we saw while stopped by construction the other day. To sum up everything we saw on the extended trail today would be waterfalls and deer. Though the two made the trip exciting for the first turn or so, it got well frankly, boring. If someone was up ahead and said, “Look,” I’d say, “Let me guess, a small waterfall, or a deer perhaps?”

“Yes,” they’d say, “how’d you know?”

“The last bend.” I’d say.

I am now starting to think about mosquitoes here, and those back home. The difference, I suppose, aside from the Alamo type fighting numbers up here, is the smog down in So Cal keeps the creeps small, slow, and stupid. The ones down in my backyard hardly would make a mark when they would bite you, but the mosquitoes here are nasty, with bites that double the size of your arm. My legs are a small scale model of the mountains here in Glacier, complete with snow and wild mountain goats bouncing about. Each bite steals a little of my pigment. The ones that I am getting now turn white and look surprisingly like a skin disease, or an allergic reaction. Though I am not quite sure they are mosquito bites, I assume they are, since there is nothing else around here except poison oak.

The more people I see, often in long, crowded bus rides, I see the contrast to the people here and those in theCalifornia region. Unlike the bugs down south, the people in OC stick to themselves and aren’t super friendly (with the exception of the people in my church). Now the great sights and the fact that these people are on vacation could be factors in their kindness, but partially I think it is because where I live is on-your-toes-busy; fast paced. Taking things slow is a nice way to go, especially when there are waterfalls and deer on every around every turn.

Days 5 and 6

Here are days five and six of the journal I took on the summer trip. To read day one, click here.

Aug. 4, 2010, Day 5:

We are now camping at Glacier National Park in Montana. We’ve been in four National Parks in the five days we’ve been gone. Also today we go to see Jeremiah in his natural habitat, working by the road on an animal crossing over pass. The slow day of driving was a nice break seeing the Saoon Saloon, Taco John’s and various specks that we thought were animals. Chillin’ back at Glacier, we went down to Lake Macdonald, and on this lake we went on a raft. I always did like spinning in circles. We also attended a ranger-talk slideshow time, which looked as though no one in the campground was going to go to. Obligated by guilt, we went, and had a pleasant time looking at animals dangling over cliffs about to fall to their deaths. And actually a lot of people we; my conscience feels alright now.

Well it is getting dark. The family has a fire going, just waiting for it to finally get dark. Zac is still hoping to see the aurora, and I will show off my excellent constellation finding skills pointing out the Seven Sisters tonight. Oh yeah, I’m good. I can’t wait to see the glaciers, and soap in the bathrooms. C’mon, how hard is it to put some soap in all 50 of the restrooms, and restock them when they’re empty? I mean really? I’m an American, I want ease and comfort! What do they think I’m doing, camping?

Aug. 5, Day 6:

Glacier National Park is one of the most beautiful places I have ever seen. Wide open places with snowy mountains, and deep gorges. The landscape, apparently, was carved out a lot by moving glaciers from many years past that have later melted away. The view is like a thanksgiving banquet for your eyes; the turkey being Heaven’s Peak, with snowy mashed potatoes and gravy, smothered up and down giving your pupils the heart burn plate of beauty.

Well, as we found out today, Glacier’s signs are easily misinterpreted. We decided to ride the bus, so we thought we would stand around waiting for a couple of minutes until it arrived. But when we read the sign that said that busses come every couple of minutes, it really meant a couple of hours. At least the view was interesting…for a couple of minutes. I was looking forward to the bus ride back when it finally did come, so I could complain to the second bus driver about the first one’s absence. But we had the same bus driver both ways, which hit me like a 5 year old Twinkie, interrupting the thanksgiving feast in my bowels.

Along with the inside of crammed buses, I saw mountain goats, big horn sheep, an aggressive granny, deer, and a sign in the bathroom stall which said, “Please flush twice.” The people who made the bus signs could learn from that sign; short, blunt, and short. Though I’m not quite sure why they have a sign that says that. Is it for the courtesy of others, or the janitor? Either case, the sign can’t really be misinterpreted. And just incase it was too direct, it even says, “please.”

We are now on the other side of Glacier, at a nice little campground. And trust me, after a full day of thanksgiving feasting, the bathroom is the first place I want to stop at. One…two…this is for you, janitor.

Whoa. He wears that in public?

Continuation of the journal I took on my Epic Annual Family Summer Road Trip-Tacular.

Aug. 3, 2010, Day 4:

The day has now been completed, consisting of three words that all begin with the letter “s”; Staring, Sustenance, and Jeremiah.

Most, if not every activity, applied the use of Staring today. I am surprised that so quickly in the trip I have nearly perfected the art of Staring. Staring, as defined by me, is the act of using one’s eyes to see everything but the back of one’s eyelids. Similar to the Look, Gaze, Glance, and Observation, the Stare usually first appears when one first wakes up, and terminates when they go to sleep.

Today I occupied the Stare while on the drive. My mom got her Bachelors in Observation and quickly graduated with a Doctorate in the Stare on the section where I was at the wheel. Not only did my parents give me the hardest part to drive, with construction on hilly roads, big semis, and passing lanes were present, but also some of the most beautiful drives to torture me as I attempted to attend thecommunity college of Stare looking at the pavement.

To continue the trend of fast food on road trips, I filled up with this Sustenance. And how full I am! While my dad and I worked our Stare at Pizza Hut (which was a $6 buffet), we realized that living in California had made us accustom to different sorts of peoples and ethnic groups. We felt like the minority when only caucasion people present. Not to mention we were the only two sitting at the longest table in the entire restaurant, and we were the skinniest people in there; probably by 200 pounds. That’s including the children. We also ate at 5 Guys. In combination of both places I have eaten, I have been stinkin’ up everywhere I go. Thank the red meats!

And last but not least, Jeremiah. A friend I haven’t seen in a whole week! Now that he has a job here in Montana, we decided to come and visit him. After showing us aroundMissoula, he, the fam. and I went to go see an aurora, which supposedly was/is happening tonight. Well, at most that was a waste of time. And at least I got to work on my Stare, looking at absolutely nothing.

Well, bed is looking tasty. Oh yeah, we decided that we would overstay our welcome at Jeremiah’s and spend the night. It is now twelve’ two. Happy Wednesday! Alright, Tuesday is over - shut up

Oh give me a home...

Hope you guys are enjoying the journaling on the blog. If you would like to start enjoying them for yourself, you can click here for day one, and here for day two.

Aug. 2, 2010, Day 3:

What did the buffalo say to his kid going off to college? “Bi-son.” Well, that’s the word of the day, bison,…or tired. Unlike my previous visit to Yellowstone where we saw buffalo at a distance, and that only on the last day, this time we have been within 15 feet of bison, and have seen them in several places. I love buffalo, so majestic, so wooly, so fat headed. Nothing beats a buffalo, literally, they are massive, and yet so gentle looking. Amazing.

Along with bison we saw plenty of Elk, deer, antelope, geysers, waterfalls, and people stopped to look at a speck which they claimed was a bear. I guess they must have seen out license plate and rallied their cousins and uncles to pull a fast one on us. Silly hicks, tricks are for kids!

Although I didn’t think it possible, we had more stops today than we had yesterday. Seeing geysers and mud pots, and geysers and waterfalls, and geysers and geysers, in and out, and in and out of the car made me tired. Not to mention standing around waiting for Old Faithful to blow. Speaking of tricks, that guy-zer faked us out more than any uncle, looking like it was going to blow a dozen times. It made the camera run out of batteries, but thankfully it’s my mom’s camera, not mine. Again, ‘Ol Faithy must’ve seen the license plate.

We are now right outside of Yellowstone, at a KOAish R.V. Park, which Zac observed isn’t park like “grass and field,” but like “park your car.” RV, duh.

Well, I gotta’ go shower now, even though I have been bathing in bug spray, sunscreen, and sulfur mist all day. Not to mention sweat.

I am now convinced that the invention of bug spray was some guy who was going mad from the heat lathered himself with his wife’s hairspray, and noticed that the bugs didn’t bite him as much as his prankster uncle. Now they use the left over hairspray at the factories and replace the original label with one that says, “Bug Spray.”

I am also convinced that the spray does absolutely nothing, with the exception of annoying us all. Maybe it is another trick. The only thing mosquitoes are warded off by is the smell of the stuff, consequently so is the rest of the world. Funny how the one place we don’t put the old hairspray nowadays is our hair. Perhaps going mad from the heat is how most entrepreneurs start. Perhaps like the inventor of sunscreen.

Still Trippin'

Below is the next part of the journal that I made on my family's long summer road trip. You can read the first day's entry here.

Now on with the show!

August 1, 2010, Day 2:

Today is the first day of camping. Driving today, we passed through three states, two national parks, and what seems like 300 visitor centers from various places. The worst one was in Utah about the Oregon Trail. Half of it was paintings made for the museum, the other half was quilts. Quilts. Quilts? Who cares about quilts?! They may have been interesting had they actually been made by people traveling to Oregon, but they were made just to fill the other half of the visitor center.

The third half didn’t even have its lights on, even though that looked like the most interesting part. I guess they decided no to pay the electric bill on Sunday mornings because everyone in Utah a Mormon. So there are plenty of crew cuts, bicycles, and carefully planned brick communities around their tabernacles (which everyone would be at on Sunday mornings).

The rest of the drive was way more exciting consisting of beautiful forests, open plains, and The Tetons. And what Grand Tetons they were; spectacular mountains we spent most of the day looking at.

Following twisty, barfy roads, we found our way to Yellowstone. After our recovery, we ate dinner. Thankfully it was my mom’s cooking so we only got a little sick from eating the meal. We went to the lake to see some bugs, and we ended up seeing some geysers as well. We went to a spot we went to the last time we were here, and the mosquito bites hurt then too.

Coming back to the campsite we saw some Elk. It doesn’t take one long here to realize that you can’t see stuff from the road, all you have to do is to look for people stopped by the side of the road acting like they are pointing and taking pictures. Joey finally saw something.

Now I am writing by the light of the flashlight, I hope we have enough batteries. A few moments ago I saw a bat, or a big bird, or a small bird depending on how big you think a bat is.

Alright, I need to go to sleep, but here is my Yellowstone song, sung to the tune of the Hawaii Chair commercial, “Yellowstone, it’s a great place, don’t ya’ know! Saw some geysers like ‘Ol Faithful. You really outta’ go!”

Oh yeah! I had my first heart attack of the trip today when Matt nearly stepped on a snack and I was standing right behind him. Until tomorrow, if the mosquitoes allow. Good Night.

Day 1

I kept a journal while on my Epic Annual Family Summer Road Trip-Tacular, and since it was taking up so much room on my other blog, I decided to commit this entire one to road tripping. There are plenty enough things to complain about when you're in the back of a car, surely enough to fill every available space in this blog. So please enjoy as I attempt to post all 20 days of the trip here. A task which I still haven't been able to accomplish.

July 31, 2010,

Epic Annual Family Summer Road Trip-tacular Day 1:

Today we started out epic trip north similar to birds in summer. My family and I, a couple of bird-brains, are questing on another summer travel. But if you are reading this you probably know all that already.

We didn’t leave too early this morning which was kind of a bummer because then none of us got any sleep in the car. The drive today was smooth with just a few 30 foot potholes, 30 billion pit stops, small fights, cliffs, rocks, and the occasional thunder storm. Yeah, it’s going pretty smooth. Today is the longest day of driving, or so my parents make me believe, but thankfully video games saved the day. And I actually won a few times on Mario Kart. We saw many exciting sights today such as Kolob Canyons (a part of Zion National Park), which was beautiful, sunsets, double rainbows, and Joey didn’t see any cows. We stopped and ate lunch today in a Carl’s Jr., in a gas station, in Las Vegas…yeah triple sketch.

Seems like a long time since we waved goodbye to Mark, Tawnie, and The Cimino, since we have gone through four states today. And yet after all that traveling I still can’t sleep because my body is on Pacific Time, while reality is in Mountain Time.

Well, I will try to keep these things short since not only am I penning down this even with journal and comic, but Matt is documenting via video, Zac through facebook, and Joey is doing absolutely nothing. (Sorry for all the disses Joey.) So the trip should be well remembered.

Shutter Shades in the Shadows, Ben.